1.1.11

January 1, 2011 (wow, i still don't get the hang of typing 2011, i typed 2010)

So, anyway, it's new year. 2010 had been, i don't know how to put it; it had been very kind, very giving, and very mean to me. It started with a blast. Then surprised me during the summer. It asked me to do a very important decision that definitely changed my life. It had been very nice during the 1st half of the year, it started my 2nd half with travels and good news.  But it had been very mean when it neared the last part of the year. Needless to say, 2010 had been a very bumpy ride and i'll be perfectly hypocrite if i wouldn't say i loved the ride, somehow.  2010 taught me a lot of things.  Elaborating all the lessons that i've learned wouldn't be necessary anymore, for what's important is that i've learned. 

2010 wouldn't be one hell of a year without the people who had been a great part of the said year.  And as usual, and i'll never get tired of saying this, THANK YOU -- 2 words i'll never,ever forget.  

So there, so long 2010, hello 2011. (i still don't know how to welcome 2011, i'm still in a bit of a limbo, you see.)

11-09-10

November 9

This is clearly NOT my day.  A string of unfortunate events happened.  And the highlight today: I was elected as the president for our Developmental Journalism class.  I do NOT LIKE responsibility.  My goal this semester is to pass all my subjects. THAT'S IT. I never put being a president on my goal O.o I just hate it. I hate it, I hate it, I. HATE. IT. ugh. KMN please.  Gahd.  So long for a moderate busy semester, hello very, VERY busy semester :( 

On a lighter note, . . .

I was walking on our street earlier when I saw kids playing.  I remembered my little brother, my shoti liit.  I miss him.  And I just don't miss his being malambing, and being gullible (sometimes), and having someone to boss around (kidding Ü); I also miss his being annoying sometimes, being stubborn, being disobedient sometimes.  Simply put, I miss the totality of him, and I realized that what I felt for my little brother, and the other brother (shoti laki), too is pure love.  This is the unconditional love that is always found in families.  And soon, I would like to feel this kind of love to another human being that is not biologically related to me.  Then, we'll create our own family to whom I'll show the unconditional love that I feel towards my family and to their old man :) 

47 days before Christmas.

Odd. I feel rather sad or melancholic. Sure, I feel the Christmas spirit; with all the gift giving and such. But, why do I feel down as the days near the 25th of December? I don't want to think that it's because I've lost someone that's why I feel this way.  I mean, it's been 4 years, and yes, it has been 4 years already and Christmas is still almost an ordinary day.  Sigh. I'll try to avoid this feeling.  Everyone should be happy, or at least just for this day.  o.o

Goodnight.,

HP Fever

My HP hype is back! :D I'm so excited to see HP7 Part1.  Ohh, I just hope they would give justice to this last book.  I mean, it's the last book, the last installment, they might as well give all their best to it and not murder it like what they did to the first 6 books.  

So, anyway, in line with this HP fever, if I have the chance to have horcruxes, these would be the items I'll have:

• Naruto cup I gave my brother 2 Christmas ago. -- Please, don't ask why, it's like the first thing I saw while doing this. O.o
• HIMYM cds -- The reason is very obvious.
• My favorite family picture -- I think it was taken when I was still in 3rd year high school.
• This laptop -- I just love this baby ;)
• My Hello Kitty notebook last sem -- It's my favorite school notebook.  It shows my determination to have really decent grades last semester.
• Wayfarer shades -- My favorite shades of all time.  
• My Pilot G-Tec C4 pen -- Please, don't ask why. :)

Toodles. 

11-07/08-10

November 7.

6 words for this day. HARRY POTTER 1-6 MARATHON. ^____^

November 8.

Monday. The first class for MC7 TV Writing and Production. It started off with a quiz, just as I expected. Our instructor gave as a quick overview of the course, and I'm so dead when we get to the part of writing Visayan news :/. Yes, my waterloo.  Even if I stayed here in Davao for 4 years already, I still couldn't construct a straight Visayan sentence; it's either I misuse a word/words or I mispronounce them. But then again, this course still makes me excited :D. Yeap, so much for that.  I have to go back watching dvds :) 

P.S.: I love, love, love Neil Patrick Harris, he really is AWESOME ;)

11-05/06-10

November 5

I wasn't able to make a post on this day because I was drunk. Yeap, my friends and I started drinking at 1am.  And I hate it.  I mean, I hate the aftermath.  I had hyper-acidity and it was so painful.  I even dislocated a bone at my back and now it's swelling. Ugh. KMN. I swear, this would be the last time I'd be drinking hard.  I don't experience hyper-acidity when I drink beer.  And by the afternoon, Aubrey and I watched dvds until we fell asleep.  

November 6

Aubrey and I were surprised when we woke up.  We were able to sleep on the same couch.  It's kinda hard to explain our sleeping position.  So anyway, we continued our dvd marathon.  Then, started my Christmas shopping (I know, very early, but what can i do, I have a lot of people to give gifts to) this afternoon.  I already bought my gifty for mother :)

P.S.: Please forgive me for this very mediocre post.  I'm kinda excited to watch Harry Potter 1-6 again. :3

11-04-10

November 4.

It's Jill's birthday :) 

And I finally met my Theater instructor.  And he's something. I mean, one must really be careful in dealing with him and also with their actions in front of him.  He can be nice, but he can kill you. Oh well, in spite of that, I'm still excited with this class.  I have always loved theater.  It has been my frustration and I'm really happy that it's one of my majors.  So, good luck to me and more power, because I can sense that this semester will be a bumpy ride! 

P.S.: I'm glad he's okay.  I'm a bit uneasy since my last dream few nights ago.  Thank you Lord.

11-03-10

November 3.

First day of class and as expected, the classes didn't start. So, we just hang out at Barbie's house and watched Teeth.  I don't want to elaborate the movie, it's just a very sick movie, especially the last part o.o

So there, it's a bit of a boring day, I think, or maybe it's just me.  I already had my warm bath, so yeah, I'm kinda sleepy already.  I think this had been a long day. 

P.S.: I miss ex -,- 

Goodnight

11-02-10

November 2. 

Second semester will start tomorrow. Rawr. 3 majors for this semester and they're all very demanding subjects. Tv production, Theatre, and Developmental Journalism; I wish I could survive all these subjects. Whew. 

So, anyway, it's now November, and all I can ask for this month is to be more awesome! I want to make this month more exciting, I wish more opportunities would come my way, more new experiences, more out of town trips (so that I could explore Mindanao more), and more new friends. 

P.S.: This is a very, very short post. What up?! 

Anniversary!

Hi! This baby is now 1 year old! :D Yey! Whew! I couldn't believe that this baby lasted a year. I mean, my patience for updating this was outstanding. 1 year -- a lot had happened during that 1 year.  I can remember that when I started this blog, I was already in good terms with a friend from before.  I could also remember that I was addicted to games at Facebook.  This was also the time when I broke up with my boyfriend and entered in a relationship with a very good friend.  Ahhh, 1 year. 1 year is just so fast.  So, anyway, I wish that this blog would have a very long life. Well, obviously that would depend on me, I'm like the life line of this baby.  Hmm, Lord another 1 year of patience to update this site :) Thanks! 

P.S.: I spent this day at Costa Marina and I soaked myself under the sun. Thus, SUNBURN! And finished almost 3 cases of San Mig Light with my 3 friends. What up? O_O

A letter to the grave.

Hey Pa, what up? I can smell flowers in the living room right now, so yea, I miss you too :). It's been 4 years Pa, and I never moved on.  As they say, nobody moves on when a loved one dies, they just get use to the fact that they're not here anymore. I miss you a lot Pa.  I miss it when you ask me to do something, I miss it when we eat out, I miss it when we want to watch movies, horror or suspense for that matter, I miss it when you would eventually fall asleep once we start watching those movies, but what I really miss is when you make me feel that you're proud of me and of what I do.  Guess what Pa, shoti laki and shoti liit are really active members of Bell Church and shoti laki won 1st place on an Impromptu Speech in English. I'm so proud of them and I know you are just as proud as I am. 

After 4 years, though, I'm still studying.  I shifted course.  I'm sorry Pa. I know you would want me to finish HRM, but I can't do it anymore.  I'm so sorry I'm such a mess and a screw-up. I failed you Pa. I'm so sorry.  Don't worry, I'm trying my best to make you proud again.  This is the career that I really want to pursue. 

It's sad, though, that you wouldn't be with us when we grow up.  You wouldn't meet my boyfriend now, and shoti laki's girlfriend and shoti liit's future girlfriend.  We can't chill together.  You wouldn't be here to see how much we have changed.  But I'm not complaining with God's plan to get you at a young age.  He has better plans.  I couldn't bear to see you suffering should you be able to survive your attack 4 years ago.  I believe God took you because you were ready to be with Him.  

This is kinda long already. See you in the future Pa (I was suppose to type soon, but then I realized, not yet Pa, I kinda have a lot of things to do first). But I know, we'll be together again.  I really miss you Pa. I love you. 

Pug Is LOVE

Hi! I was scanning my journal when all of a sudden, I want to have a pug! I know, I'm so weird. But, anyway, I want a pug :D I want, want, want! They're so cute and adorable, especially their cute and expressive eyes. Awww <3 Makes me want to take them home and give them lotsa love :). Haaaaayyy, they're so cute. Now I know what I want for Christmas or my birthday! :D I want a pug, or if not, an External Hard Drive, heee :3. But,anyway, I want a pug, a male pug that is. And it should be black :D. Asking for a pug isn't too much, right? ;) 

Cutie Pattotie! I want to cuddle it! <3

10-28-10

Hi there. I'm trying to write what I feel. I used to do it but now I don't know why I'm having a hard time doing it. Maybe it's because I'm holding back and I don't know why I should hold back, it's not like a lot of people are reading my posts. 

So, anyway, I miss boyfriend.  I miss him even more just thinking that he would be here for the holidays. We've been trying to survive our long distance relationship for 6 months already and so far, we've been doing great <3.  However, it kinda scares me when I think of the future.  The thought that maybe we'll have an expiration date scares me.  I pray we won't have that (expiration date).  I don't like having him as an ex-lover. Ugh. Why am I having this feelings, in the first place? It's not that he's giving me any reasons for me to feel this. Sigh.  I really don't want to think about this, because once I start having this thought, I have the tendency to over-think and over-thinking is not healthy for me. It can make me crazy for like days until this odd feeling goes away. 

Sigh, I just want to sleep this feeling away. . .

P.S.: I miss my brothers,too. I can't wait for next year, I would like to see them and hang out with them.

10-27-10

Hi! Yes this is the recent me. And yes, I FAT. But the heck! I like it better :) 

And another one! :P

Just sharing. I've been wanting to perfect this Asian-open mouth-pacute look! And I'm not exactly sure if I get it already. What do you think? O.o

"Don't give your everything when you're in love, because when he leaves you, you'll be left with nothing and end up crying and hurt"

I've been hearing this line for so many years already. I used to believe on this but I realized that this line only works for those who don't really know how to love.  Sorry, no offense meant, but I think people who believe on this are scaredy cats and selfish. 

Yes, I was a scaredy cat and selfish before.  I entered in relationships but I didn't give my everything to it; I didn't give my full trust, my full love, and yes, I was also selfish, too.  Ironic, though, because when all these relationships ended, I was left crying and hurt.  And I also ended up thinking a lot of "what ifs". 

That's why I realized that when we enter in a relationship, we must give everything to it to make it work. So what if we would look stupid once in a while? It's okay, it's normal.  And, our partner deserves our full love and trust and loyalty.  I'm not saying that by giving everything would give us an assurance that our relationships would work.  No, that's not what I'm trying to point out.  Nothing can give us an assurance that relationships will last.  What I'm trying to say is, should our relationships don't last, at least, we know on ourselves that we can love truly, that we did our part. And should it last, then we know on ourselves that we really deserve it because we worked hard on it and we've been true to our partner and to the relationship since day 1. 

And don't worry about not being able to love again after getting hurt.  We can still love after this, the fact that we're still alive is an indication that we are still capable of loving <3

I'm Sorry.

I'm Sorry.

Yes. I'm sorry to all the people that I hurt and people I didn't know I hurt. 

I'm also sorry to the people I used to be close with but I didn't know what happen, we just drifted apart. 

I'm also sorry to the people I don't get to talk with anymore because, well,  I don't know, maybe I'm too scared to talk with you again.

Yes, I'm sorry, I really am. 

I miss being with these people that I hurt, that I drifted apart with, and that I don't get to talk with anymore. I want everything to be okay again. And, well, as much as I want it to be okay, I think I just have to wait for the right time to come.  I still believe that when the right time comes everything would be okay. 

Few years back, I have a friend and we had a very ugly fight. A fight that was really ugly and messy. And so, we stayed enemies for how many weeks.  Until one day, I learned that my friend had a near-death experience. The moment I learned about it, I got scared and thought: "my goodness! what if that friend died? I never get to say sorry to that friend" It was creepy and I felt like crying that time.  I was just glad that my friend is still alive until now.  The very sad part though, that friend and I still don't get to talk.  Sure ,we  can get to see each other once in a while, but we still don't get to talk.  I would love to talk to that friend but I just don't have the balls to do it.  I hope, before this year ends, I get to talk to that friend, so that everything would be okay. And to the rest of the people that I owe an apology. 

Good morning! 

It's 6:22am and I haven't had sleep. I downloaded Season 6, Episode 2 of How I Met Your Mother but the episode was not complete D: 

So, I just browsed my Music folder and listened to 500 Days of Summer, Jennifer's Body, and Juno soundtrack. And I thought of something,...why not play some of the songs from the soundtracks on one of jam sessions with Barbie? I checked all the chords of the songs we would like to play and all of them are easy-peasy. Nothing that Barbie can't strum :D 

Paging Barbie: Pssssssttt.... Let's start practicing,oki? I thought of the song line up already. =]

Hi! It's already 2:30am and I'm making this post not because I couldn't sleep, but because I came from a session :) 

And, honestly, I don't know what I'll write down. I just feel like making a post and not exactly thinking what topic/s to write about. So, yeah, consider this as another super random post :) 

I don't know if it's weird or what, but, the closer the days are coming 'till the day I get to see him, the more excited I become. This is my first time to feel this way. Heeeeee :3 November is fast approaching and I shall start my countdown. And I'll try my best to update this blog everyday starting November until the day we meet again :) So.Freakin'.Excited :D If everything would go smoothly 'till the year ends, this year would be one of  my best years ever! And would also be one of my best birthdays ever! :D Sheesh! I'm so excited right now, promise! I really am, as in, RIGHT NOW :D Shux! Shux! Shux! :D 

Alrighty! I think it's time to hit the bed and sleeepp :) btw, i literally slept the whole day yesterday. I was just up for 3 hours to eat brunch, then went back to sleep. I think I just made bawi from the super long weekend I had ;) 

Eleven Minutes

From Maria's diary, on a day when she had her period and couldn't work

If I were to tell someone about my life today, I could

do it in a way that would make them think me a

brave, happy, independent woman. Rubbish: I am not

even allowed to mention the only word that is more

important than the eleven minutes--love.

All my life, I thought love as some kind of vol-

untary enslavement. Well, that's a lie: freedom only

exists when love is present. The person who gives him 

or herself wholly, the person who feels freest, is the 

person who loves most wholeheartedly.

And the person who loves wholeheartedly feels

free.

That is why, regardless of what I might experience, 

do or learn, nothing makes sense. I hope this time passes

quickly, so that I can resume my search for myself--in 

the form of a man who understands me and does not

make me suffer.

But what am I saying? In love, no one can harm

anyone else; we are each of us responsible for our own 

feelings and cannot blame someone else for what we

feel.

It hurt when I lost each of the various men I 

fell in love with. Now, though, I am convinced that no one 

loses anyone, because no one owns anyone.

This is the true experience of freedom: having the 

most important thing in the world without owning it. 

                                                                                 Page 88-89

Good, clean fun (as what Sir Alex would always say)

"Tignan mo, hindi tayo pupunta sa mga bars, wala tayong nightlife, but we're definitely havin' fun."- Eumi.

Napaisip ako dun sa statement na yun. And yes, I so agree to her. We don't have any nightlife, but everyday, we have fun, we are still happy and fun-loving people minus the smell of smoke and hang over.

I noticed that people who don't have any nightlife are stereotyped as boring people. Remarked as Santa or Santo pero in a sarcastic way. And that's not true, jackass lang nagsasabi nun.

Anyway...

Whenever I think of nightlife, I always think that it's not for me. Maybe, after graduation, I would start havin' that kind of life. Pero, when I think of it, there's this little voice that tells me, You don't need it. You're already havin' fun. And then, I would just shrug off the idea of actually havin' a nightlife. After all, I'm contented with my good, clean fun. :)

This is a post I had 3 years ago. And I'm what,. 17 when I wrote this post. Now, fast forwarding to 2010. I realized how different I am.  I used to be contented just chilling at home (well, until now, but not that much anymore). I can easily turn down a drinking session. But now, I'm having a hard time turning down an invite for a drink.  And for the past months, I always have a drinking session in a week that would last until morning of the next day.  I would also have drinking sessions even on weekdays that I would come home in the wee hours of the morning and I can't catch any sleep anymore because my class for that day is too early.  I even tried going to class drunk! (well, I think doing it once in a while is cool n.n). For the past 3 years, tremendous changes happened.  From the way I look, the way I act, and the way I perceive things around me. I don't know, though, but I'm becoming more and more open minded. With all the things that I've seen and experienced for the past months, I couldn't help but think that "the fuck! Is this really life?!" But then again, life's what you make it.  It still up to me to either accept or reject things in life. However, in spite these changes, one of the things that didn't change is the fact that I can still enjoy good, clean fun.  I can still have fun with simple things, like chatting with friends over food minus the alcohol, playing LAN games with them, or just bumming out for hours, talking with my friends while they puff their cigars. :)

Hi. It's 1:40am and I'm far from being sleepy. I really want to sleep because when I'm awake, I tend to entertain a lot of things inside my head. My little rogueys are tired already. It's been a long day and I'm surprised that I'm still not sleeping. The t.v. set is still on and I want to download an album but I don't know what album to download. I want to watch HIMYM on the net, but my net is too slow to load a whole episode *sigh*. 

I can't think of anything sensible to write. These thoughts are all but free-flowing. Whatever comes out of my brain, I write it down. 

I hate disappointments. For years, I've been trying to get used to them, because, you know, disappointments are always there.  But, it's really hard getting used to them *sigh*. Oh well...

It's already October. It's already the 2nd week and I can't believe how fast time flies. It's like just summer yesterday and now, the holiday is fast approaching.  And I'm very excited.  There are just so many things to celebrate about in the coming months. 

I miss a lot of people and I hope that I could make time for them this semestral break. In example, my bestfriend, Mimi :) I miss her a lot, I hope that I could get to fetch her after her work then hang out and talk and eat and talk and eat. Or maybe hang out at their place. I miss our karaoke sessions and dvd marathon and non-stop chats while watching. Ahhh, good times. I miss it a lot. I even miss our Pancake Thursday. I hope next time, it will be Pasta Monday/Tuesday/Wednesday/Thursday/Friday/Saturday/Sunday, I don't really care what day, as long as it would have pasta and my bestfriend :) 

Hey.ho.sagos! :D It's been what, umm, I can't remember when was my last post and I've been wanting to update my blog for the past few days, however, my final exams and research were getting on my way. And now, T.G.I.S.! Yes, not only because the fact that it's SATURDAY, but the fact that finally, our research is ready for book bind! I couldn't be more happy to know that our teacher allowed us to have our paper book bind by Monday. After all the countless research, edit, and print, our group had finally made it! Our RESEARCH PAPER = BOOK BIND! Yahooo! :D Now our research had came to an end, what I'll definitely miss is our Tuesday/Thursday Research Galore in our house. We bought food and I cook for my group mates and I loved it! :) Ahhhh,, good times. Not only did we have fun eating, but gossiping and conversing,too. I loved it and will definitely miss it :) 

So by next week, my only concerns would be my Health 1 and Political Science 1 exams and the bookbinding. Yes! I can't wait for next week! Let it be Monday please, please. For the first time, I've been wanting it to be Monday :D

Whew! Thanks Big Man Up There! ;) 

I Tweet.

Tweet, tweet. Tweet, tweet...

Heeee :3 Created another account on Twitter. Look for bb_brightside :D Yes, I'm full of brightness! :D 

Realizations over Pork Ribs :D

This post may seem very intriguing or controversial, but really, it's not :D. These are just thoughts I have in mind that I've realized for the past months :)

1. Sometimes, temptations are okay and going after those temptations are okay, too, because in the long run, you'll get disappointed with those "temptations" and appreciate more what you have.
2. Grab every chance in life! So when the time comes that you decide to settle down, you wouldn't have to worry about "what ifs".
3. Looking at the glass as half full, not half-empty = My greatest STRENGTH, but also my greatest WEAKNESS. 

Shoutout!! :DD

Hi! :) Yes, I'm back, again. I've been busy, as usual. Rawr. It's final exam week and I can't wait for sem-break to start. Weeee! :) I can color my nails again with loud and bold colors., yey for that! I can finally attend on my Tumblr, Plurk, and Blogspot again :3 heeeeeee -,- So, yea, anyway. . .My friend Barbie had finally created an account here. FINALLY! :D Yes, please follow her or whatever. Here's the linky: Mind of A Wimpy Kid 

On an exciting note. . . I haz a next post after this one, more sensible than this post ;) 

Breather!

Hi! :) I've been on unannounced hiatus for 3 months. Heeee :3. I've been very busy with school stuffs and friends :D. So anyway, 2 weeks ago (I think), I finally had my "breather".  My friends and I went to Mati. Mati is a place in Davao Oriental which is 3 hours away from Davao, well, in our case, 'twas just 2 hours away ;) Mati is a paradise.  The sand, the beach, the people,. it's just plain heaven :). There were a lot of recreational activities there.  There's frisbee (which was so tiring to play) but still FUN! :D, skim boarding (which I wasn't able to enjoy because I'm such a scaredy-cat and too tired from playing frisbee), surfing (I wasn't even able to try), swimming in the open sea! (I don't exactly know what's the right term for what we did), snorkeling (which I didn't do in the morning because of the jelly fishies). By night, we played cards and drank.  For the first time, I was able to try Slammer.  Slammer consists of a shot of tequila and a glass of beer. Put the shot of tequila inside the glass of beer then chug it all down (stopping is not allowed :P). The usual me got tipsy and all, so I asked a friend to accompany me to swim.  Twas a wrong move on my part, though. After the night swimming, I had chills. I chilled for I-don't-know-how-many-hours. But thanks to Marianne, Law, Aubrey, and Henzel for taking care of me. Heeeeeee :3.  The next morning, we had squids for breakfast. Yum! Then, before lunch, we went home.  Ahhh, Mati is <3. I shall be back in Mati really soon :) 

Photos from Mati:

paradise :) 

with my girls: marianne and aubrey :)

trying out frisbee :) weeee n.n

by night, playing cards. rawr.

good morning mati

 (thanks to my following sponsors: henzel for the top and law for the shorts LOL)

my laag buddies! marianne, law, and aubrey :)

group picture! :D

**Please don't be too hard on me should you find errors on this post. I'm still sleepy :)

I never thought this could be a very long post! :D

I'm never really good at making friends, but as far as I know, I am good at keeping them, until I found out that 2 of the people I considered friends betrayed me.  In my 20 years of living, this is the first time I encountered this problem and I was so clueless on how to handle it. I felt so bad and the pain was even worse than a break-up.  The last time I felt this bad was 2 years ago, after I broke up with my boyfriend.  What made the situation worse was I never know what were their reasons for betraying me.  They never cared to tell me what I might have done wrong to them or what might have been wrong with me.  I don't know, maybe they just didn't have the balls to tell me even if I already confronted and asked one of them if there's something wrong.  And just like people who doesn't have any proper upbringing at all (I pity their parents who never raised them properly), they just laughed as if nothing happened.  And yes, I cried. The thought of betrayal is just so painful.  I couldn't believe they did that to think that I tried to be a great friend to them.  I was a true friend to them.  

After talking to my friends about this, I realized that God is great.  He always have better plans.  The other, other night, I prayed that *friend1 doesn't have ill-feeling towards me, that my intuition was wrong.  And then the next day, *friend1 chatted me on FB(even complimented me and stuff), so I thought, "wow, that was fast, thank you Lord".  Little did I know, it was God's way of showing me that they're not real friends because that was the same day I learned that they were talking behind my back and calling me names (God knows since when).  So, there, so much for those "friends" that I had.  My real friends are right, at the end of the day,  it's their lost not mine.  I'm always a real friend to everyone, including to them and if they didn't value it or appreciate it then clearly, they're the ones who has the problem. I'll stop pondering on the questions like what's wrong with me or what could I have done wrong.  Maybe the very reason they couldn't tell it to me is because nothing's wrong with me.  Maybe my real friends are right, they're just INSECURE bitches.  And yes, I think I should agree with it now.  I'm confident about myself.  I'm beautiful in every way I can be (inside-out). I'm intelligent and talented and so much more.  And more importantly, I'm happy, I choose to be happy.  I'm happy with all my decisions, no regrets.  I'm happy and contented with what I have now.  And now, I understand, maybe they couldn't stand the thought that I AM HAPPY. Oh well, some people. O.o

I'm looking at this situation on a different light now.  God let this happen so that I could appreciate more the real friends that I have.  And yes, I'll cherish these people everyday.  I'll always be thankful for these people who don't have second thoughts of telling me if I'm doing something wrong and will always accept me in spite of my stupidity.  Clearly, they're the ones worth keeping forever <3 

Anon. Anon. Anon

Let me talk about my drugs. Nope, not your ordinary drugs, not even my boyfriend.

My drugs,. is 

HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER

Ahh GAHD! Blame Eumi Danine Ramos Molina who introduced this to me. Who painstakingly insisted me to watch it. Huuuu. I'm done with the 3 seasons and I want to start season 4! 'Cause you know, I'm excited with Barney, I think he's falling for Robin! Oh gahd! HAHAHAHA I'm having cold sweats and my heart beat is not normal while I'm typing this. Jeez, just thinking about it makes me crazy, I NEED MY DAILY DOSE OF HIMYM :( 

I just have to let this out. 

Kthnxbye!

when bossa couldn't lift my spirits

Hi there. Eumi and I watched Shrek Forever After yesterday and I attended Dara's debut (pool party). Ex called me this morning, and haaayy, I feel down again, my "one of the days" attack :(

Dear, let's avoid bvs (bad vibes), okei? Please, just trust me, yes? I love you more than anyone in this world. People know it and you know it. This isn't easy, but trust me when I say I'll wait for you. Dear, 1 year and 5 months is not that long, trust me. Next thing we know, we'll be together again, but for the mo, let's trust each other, okay? I know I do trust you, I trust you not only that you wouldn't cheat on me, but I also trust you that you wouldn't give up on me, on us. We can do this! We will prove ourselves one day that we made it. *sigh* i love you,okay? Hang on, dear, 2011 is near, you'll be back and i'll be waiting. P.S.: I don't care about the other boys, I have the best :) 

To My First love and True love

Hai there ~.~ 

I'm not sure how would this go about.  This can be long and painful or short yet sweet. It might be simple or complicated, I don't really know. All I know is that this would be truthful in every word and no room for any pretensions whatsoever.  

And so, here goes nothing. . .

You, my first love, is the only person who I owe the most of who I am today.  You'll always have a little space in my life forever. Now I understand why all these years, you're always that someone I think of every time I'll look at myself and think of how much I've changed. Although, I had been denying it to myself and not a single soul knows about this. Thanks to my professor who enlightened me, however indirectly, in this situation.  And from now on, I'll recognize the fact that one of the ingredients of me today is you. 

And you, my true love, who makes me do things I've never done before, who patiently waited for me and see all the changes in me, who finally took the risk so that the "us" today becomes a realization. I thank you forever and ever. And yes, I'll wait, just like what we did, we waited for the "us" to happen and Thank God and fate and the universe for finally letting this sweetest conspiracy happen. Yes true love, I'll always be thankful. Each waking day of my life, I'll always whisper this silent prayer of appreciation for giving me the greatest gift of my life, yet. And that is to be finally be with you, to finally let out the love that has been hidden all these years. This feels so good, so right, I never want it to end. This is a forever dream I would not want to wake up from. It might have a few nightmares here and there but that would make the dream more realistic, more worth it, more precious and more priceless. I'm so full right now I couldn't contain myself. Gaaahhhh, this is true love.  

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." - 1 Corinthians 13:1-13

I'm supposed to be watching HIMYM now but I'm not :x

"Kung dalawa ang mahal mo, piliin mo yung pangalawa. Kasi hindi ka naman magmamahal ng iba kung mahal mo talaga yung una."

Can I relate to this? DEFINITELY! :)) And I made the right choice ;). Do I have to elaborate about it? I don't think so. Let me just put it this way,.

I'M THIS HAPPY ^__________________________________________________^,

this happy everyday, though, crappy feelings crawl up once in awhile, they're gone by the time I go to bed. Heeee :3. And that's thanks to you Mr. Second Choice that I chose and never,ever have regrets of doing so :P 

UBER BORED! XD

The Favorites, Have-You-Evers.. and Last Times! Oh, the variety!
What is your favorite..
gum:	cry baby! HAHAHA
restaurant:	for the mo., hmm,. i can't think of any! HAHAHA
drink:	lemonade blush. caramel coffee :)
season:	season of love! HAHAHA
type of weather:	rainy
emotion:	undecided. :D
thing to do on a half day:	go straight home, surf the net, watch HIMYM :D
late-night activity:	sleep
sport:	sleeping and eating! (first placer!)
city:	Davao :) "my heart now belongs to Davao"
store:
When was the last time you..
cried:	hmm...2 or 3 weeks ago
played a sport:	yesterday (eat and sleep) :P
laughed:	awhile ago (thanks to HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER)
hugged someone:	hahaha i think i hugged a friend this week, or was it last week? :)
kissed someone:	April 13,2010! (will stay this way until September of 2011)
felt depressed:	yesterday, kinda,.
felt elated:	the other day
felt overworked:	last sunday!!!! gaaahhhddd! D;
faked sick:	last week :P
lied:
What was the last..
word you said:
thing you ate:	rice and patties
song you listened to:	Talk Shows on Mute/Incubus
thing you drank:	iced tea
place you went to:	school
movie you saw:
movie you rented:
concert you attended:	Tanduay First 5 Concert
Who was the last person you..
hugged:	a friend, I can't remember who. Marianne I guess :3
cried over:	ex? (i was lonely, alright)
kissed:	EX! :D
danced with:	friends hahaha. I think with Eumi
shared a secret with:	Eumilot
had a sleepover with:	Eumimi
called:	EX :)
went to a movie with:	Cj and Boss Police heheh :3
saw:	my prof.
were angry with:	my world lit. classmates!
couldn't take your eyes off of:	my computer screen
obsessed over:
Have you ever..
danced in the rain:	yes
kissed someone:	yes
done drugs:	no
drank alcohol:	yes
slept around:
partied 'til the sun came up:	YES! HAHAHA (movie partey!)
had a movie marathon:	yes!
gone too far on a dare:	YES! lovette!
spun until you were immensely dizzy:	YES!

HATE POST :)

Finally, summer class is over. Huzzzaazz! 

And since tapos na ang summer class, I just want to say this.

Leche ang mga classmate ko sa likod. Lalo na ung babaeng anlakas-lakas ng bunganga. Miss, pede mabingi Ilang decebel lang ang kaya ng tenga ko, and gaaahhhdd, masisiraan ako ng tenga sayo. Di kayo ganun kagaling, lalo ka ng miss,.err,ewan, yan na lang tawag ko sayo, or panget, pede rin. So, anyway, as I was saying miss ewan and panget, di kayo ganun kagaling para manlait kayo ng mga classmate natin. Oo, naririnig ko kayo nung sobrang panget mong kasama na tinatawanan mga classmate natin. Sus, gahd, english lang? MAS MAGALING AKO SA'YO. And ako na mas magaling sa'yo hindi nanlalait ng classmates natin, ikaw pa ang may ganang manlait dyn. Eeiiww.. Oh well, so ganun nga, ayun, sana di ko na kayo maging classmates forever. HAHAHAHA. 

**My first hate post ever, yata, to certain people. oh well, di naman nila to mababasa, or kung mabasa nila, okay lang din. :)) 

A friend: Anong course mo?

Me: Mass Comm.

A friend: A Mass Comm-portable sa bahay? HAHAHAH

Me: heee :3

People often thinks that the course Mass Communication is easy and well,. easy. Well, NO, it's not. I don't understand why people can joke about it as "Mass Comm-portable" 'cause it's not comfortable in any way. If you want to last as a Mass Comm. student, you should always be ready for no sleep lifestyle, criticisms, PRESSURE (definitely pressure), among other things. Someone who couldn't handle pressure will never survive this course. And one must also be good at multi-tasking and a go-getter! Good aesthetics would go a long way,too. And, yea, this course is never for the faint hearted. With all the criticisms and swearing you'll get during productions, the one with the strong heart wins. 

So there, this is the lifestyle that I've chose and I'm embracing it with all that I am. I am happy, this is what I've been wanting for so long. And I know, I'll survive. 

'cause I'm happy like that! :D

Funny, 'cause people often ask me of my age and when I say I'm 20, their reactions like: "NO WAY? You sure you're 20?! You look like a HIGH SCHOOL student!" And my signature reply would be: *laughs* oh really? Thanks! :)

I don't know why I look younger than my age. Err, maybe because of my new hairstyle? 

Or is it because I'm naturally a jolly and bubbly person :D I don't know what happened to me, but I suddenly look at life in a different way. I always find a way to look at the brighter side of things even if they're shitty as hell. Few years back, my being pessimistic was so unbearable, it led me to hell and it made me do stupid things and decisions. But after that, I don't really know what happened. I felt that I started to get better and better. The way I act, the way I think and the way I treat and face life. 

I want to think that if you're always happy, it will radiate. And I want to stay that way, to be practically happy and in love too! And radiate happiness and love to each and everyone. It's fun you know, and it feels good, too. No worries, no hassles, just a good life! :D And ofcourse, I also want to think, well, I really think that entrusting everything to that "Big Man" up there would always be a great help! :D 

Ahh, NEW LIFE! :D 

*P.S.: even if i'm always happy, doesn't mean I'm a goody-two shoes,kei? I can still be cunning and mean sometimes! SOMETIMES lang >:D 

Care Package :D

Hai! ~ ~ ~

I just slept the whole day -_- Huuuuzzaazz, oversleeping=headache :/

So what's new?

Nothing much really, same old, same old. I still miss him like crazy! =))

So let's talk about care packages.

Yeap, I want to give and receive random care packages :) I actually planned to send him care packages. Sad, though, because it's so fucking expensive! UGH! :( meh. Haaist, should I have a job right now, I could definitely send him one, but I can't, 'cause I'm still a student. meh :&

Anyway, since, there wouldn't be any way that I could send him care packages, I'll just share here what would be the things I'll be sending him ;)

• Clash of the Titans and Ironman 2 dvds - he wants to watch these movies, esp. Clash of the Titans. Sad, 'cause we weren't able to watch it before he left. 
• A condom cellphone charm- Hahaha, Yeap, you read it right. They exist! :) And I would want to send him one. I know, when he receives it, he would laugh his heart out ;) 
• 11:55 - His perfume. He forgot to buy one before he left. Tsk. And yea, I love, love, love this scent *thump, thump*
• Chupa Chups Relax (for smokers) - Not that I'm asking him to stop or whatever, it's really still up to him if he wants to stop smoking. I just like to give this to him because this is the gift that I planned to give him on our "little" kris kringle. (Yes, I'd still like to give this so that I'll have my new set of undies! hahahaha. 'cause that's what he planned on giving me.)

So there. Heeee :3 Oh well, I may not be able to send these care packages, but atleast, I thought about it. HAHAHA.

ily and imy ;) 

Medley :)

You make my dreams come true. The search is over, you were with me all the while. Funny how from simple things the best things begin. Kiss me thru the phone, see you when I get home. O kay sarap isipin, kasama kang tumanda. Maybe we've only just began, maybe the best is yet to come. However far away, I will always love you. You can't hurry love, no you just have to wait. 678triple98212. I'll take care of you, have faith that when you call my name, I'll be there. There's a love that transcends all that we've known ourselves. I will wait forever just to know you are mine. Especially for you, I want to let you know what I was going through. Loving you, oh, such an easy thing to do. All I wanna do is grow old with you. You got me thinking 'bout our life, a house and kids. Sex and white lies, handcuffs and alibis. So if you ever love me, show me that you give a damn.

*Best read on champagnesandcocktails.blogspot.com :) 

boredom ii

Seven things I wanna share:

1.  I'm a sucker for HELLO KITTY stuffs.

2.  I finally had the guts to pursue my dreams. :) 

3.  I can finally eat without worrying about my weight! :P 

4.  I can finally eat durian without throwing up (well, as long as it's Arancillo) 

5.  I'm a frustrated photographer -_-

6.  I'm a sleepy head (I just realized it just today) 
 7.  I'm a workaholic (given a chance to have a work that I really, really like) 

Tag: Alphabet Version...

A - Age: 20

B - Band Listening To Right Now: nothing. hahaha :)) 

C - Career: taking up Mass Communications, therefore, I haz a lot of career to choose after grad. :P 

D - Drink or Smoke: drink occasionally, but never smokes ;) 

E - Easiest Friends To Talk To: eumi. jill. kirs. cha :D

F - First Crush: Dean (i hope he won't able to read this one. we're friends in fb hahaha)

G - Gummy Bears or Gummy Worms: gummy worms! :D 

H - Have a Girlfriend/Boyfriend: BOYFRIEND! :D 

I - In love: SUPER! *thump, thump*

J- Junk Food You Like: any potato chips 

K - Kids: soooon ;) [magagandang lahi ;P]

L - Longest Ride Ever: Leyte-Manila @.@

M - Making love out of nothing at all: nope-y

N - Names For Your Future Kids: damien marie. micheal chase. mary rose red crystal jade (pagtinopak ako, ganito kahaba pag sa babae. hahaha)

O - One Wish You Have Now: forever and ever and ever with you :) 

P - Phobias: closed space

Q - Favorite Quote: "life's a bitch, fuck it real hard!"

R - Reasons To Smile: little things ;) 

S - Sleeping Time: anytime

T - Time You Woke Up: 6am 

U - Unknown Fact About You: I have great little talents that only few people know ;P 

V - Vegetable You Hate: OKRA! and anything slimy :&

W - Worst Habit: eating infront of the television (is that even worst?)

X - X-rays You’ve Had: medical examination, for health card. hehe. good thing i'm clean! ;) 

Y - Yummy Foods: many, many, many! 

Z - Zodiac Sign: Capricorn ;D

boredom :P

Rules:

* Do the following without any complaints.
* Choose 5 lucky people to do this after you have done it.
* Leave a tag at his/her tagboard if he/she has been tagged.


FAVORITES:
* Colors : green. yellow. purple. black :)
* Food: anything on the table. kidding! a lot! :D
* Song: Kasama kang tumanda (yea! kilig, kilig. weegol, weegol)
* Movie: My Only U (sige na, allow me to be corny and cheesy this time, yes?)
* Sports: basketball (if it's uaap)
* Day of the week: random day, any day. hahahaha
* Season: if Phils. has 4 seasons, I'd like fall :)
* Ice cream: coffee crumblr or banana split :P

CURRENTS:
* Mood: unknown

* Taste: salty. (just finished eating fried rice)
* Shirt: white pambahay shirt
* Desktop: hahaha.ex's photo ;)
* Toenail: technicolor. *nips! nips! :P
* Time: 12:54 pm
* Surroundings: sala. tv on my left.
* Thoughts: too many to mention (feel nilang magsabay-sabay gumulo sa isip ko)

FIRSTS:
* Bestfriend: grace lim hahaha
* Movie: can't remember, but for sure, it gus to be a horror flick ;)
* Lie: can't remember. too many lies hahahaha
* Songs: i'm old!!! i can't remember :(

LASTS:
* Cigar: years, years, years ago. just for fun ;) but not really a smoker
* Drink: last week!! HAHAH sooooo wasted :P
* Car ride: umm....last week. takas mode ;P
* Phone call: last night :) with ex <3 <3 <3

* CD: Fruitcake. thanks to sir alex! :) 

HAVE YOU EVER:
* Dated your best friend: hahahah :))
* Broke the law: yeap! yeap!
* Been arrested: never! hahaha
* Kissed someone you don’t know: nah. we'll do it prolly soon ;)

5 THINGS YOU’RE WEARING:
* undies
* brassiere
* white shirt
* red lipstick
* blue shorts

4 THINGS YOU’VE DONE TODAY:
* went to school
* uploaded a picture
* did my 3rd day 30 day tumblr challenge
* cooked brunch

3 THINGS YOU CAN HEAR NOW:
* First Wives' Club
* electric fan
* whispers sa neighbor :P

fucked up

hai ~ ~ ~

I'm not feeling well today. I feel nauseous and I couldn't breath properly. I even have a big ugly bruise on my leg that has a little bump in a middle that hurts when pressed. Ugh @.@ what's wrong with my body?

I don't like visiting doctors.  I don't like medical check ups, but this time, I'm considering on visiting one 'cause right now, these (i don't know what to call them, symptoms?) are bothering me.

I shall not die young. I still have a plan on throwing my 80th birthday party in the future.

Ugh, death, get away from me. It's not yet my time, kei? I'll see you in the future, not soon . . .

Blame it on the durian (just like a-aa-aaa-lcohol)

So there, 'cause I miss you like that, kei?

It makes me sad. I want to cry.  I want to remind you that "hey, iloveyou, and i'm waiting, and please, trust me, yes? kthnxbye". 

Ugghhh, so this is one of the days again, longing and all other emotions are coming to me all at once. And I just want to cry, I want to cry all these feelings out. 

Sigh, i miss you. 

Worry not, dear. Tomorrow is another day. 

iloveyou 

MY WIFE IS A SUPERWOMAN

Hi! I haz a new addiction :D hahahah I love this Koryan series MY WIFE IS A SUPERWOMAN :D I discovered this on ABC5 (so, the series is already dubbed in Tagalog, but I don't mind :P) It's a funny story of men whose wives are doing everything so that their husbands will have a good reputation in the society :) 

Let me just introduce the husband and wives in this series: 

Kim Nam-Ju (screen name)

Ji-ae Cheon (character name)

Lindsey (Tagalog name hahah)

I like her character and I like this actress, too :) She's so pretty noh? Gondo much! :D 

Oh Ji-Ho 

Dal-su On

Anjo

He's gwapo, yes? :D His character is funny and cute and in love much with his wife, Lindsey! :D 

 

Hye-yeong Lee

Bong-sun Yang

Julie

She's Lindsey's high school friend. Yeap, they haz a history. She used to be a geek back in hs, but everything changed when she got married to Jimson ;) 

 

Choi Cheol-Ho

Jun-hyeok Han

Jimson

He's Julie's husband and Lindsey's old flame back in high school He's also the boss of Anjo :D Another hottie! yea! :) 

Seon Woo-Seon

Su-hyeon Eun

Sonya

She's pretty, too, noh? n_n She's the wife of the president *tama sana ako*. And Anjo's college friend. And her character has a thing for Anjo. :P

Yun Sang-Hyeon

Tae-jun Heo

Raymart

He's Mr. President. Husband of Sonia. That's all I know about him. meh -_-

So there! yea! hahaha :)) I'm never a fan of Koryan series or movies, just a few chosen ones. And I don't know,. but I really like this series very much, along with The First Wives Club (I'll be blogging about it soon). 

P.S.: Please, dear reader, if ever you get to stumble upon a website which has a complete episodes of this series and The First Wives Club, let me know, yes? *insert pacute eyes here*  Or should you see a dvd of these series somewhere, please, please let me know. I'm so dying to have the complete copies of these series. Yea! \m/

kthnxbye! :) 

P.S.S.: i love ex! HAHAHAH :)) and i'm so proud of him, he's really good at speaking Tagalog already! :D